L-O-V-E. So much feeling is packed into this small four-letter word. In my opinion, it is the most beautiful in any language because it represents the best of humanity. R-A-P-E. Equally emotional, this is the most horrific four-letter word in the English language. It represents all that is evil about the human race.
The ultimate symbol of love between two people- sex- is turned into a power-show of horrific proportions through rape. Perhaps that is what makes it so uneasy to think about. Perhaps that is why we are so afraid of it. Sex is already stigmatized in many cultures that a violation of the act gets pushed further down the "do-no-talk-about" list.
In fact, rape is so stigmatized that we do not like to report it; on top of that, the police often hesitate to do anything about what is reported. To make matters worse, we feel uncomfortable placing blame on the perpetrators when blame ought to be placed. Take the Steubenville Case. A CNN reporter had us lamenting the football careers of two teenagers who raped an almost unconscious 16-yr old girl. Really?! "It's sad", they say. No. It is not sad that they do not get to play another day of football, they made their choice. You know what is sad? The fact that those two boys, and the other onlookers who weren't penalized, thought it would be okay to have sex with a girl who never said "yes". It is worse that they thought it was funny enough to take pictures, videos and blast in across the internet. That is what is really sad about this story. This heinous crime has worked its way into the minds and thoughts of teenage boys in Heartland, America-- the once iconic "innocence of America". It seems as though no matter where you look, rape has left it destructive presence.
We as a human race, for whatever reason, are slow to change. Honestly, it took us around 100,000 years to decide to plant food instead of chasing it around all year. It took 300 years for the Atlantic Slave Trade to be abolished. It took a Civil War to free the slaves in America but it wasn't until over 50 years later that those of color truly became "free".
Rape has existed since .... well, forever, I suppose. Every 20 minutes, a woman in India is raped; it is down to less than every 5 minutes in South Africa; even America, that number ranges between every 2 to 6 minutes. It is easy to write it off as "a sad reality of life". Try using that excuse to the girl repeatedly raped every day because she is held in bondage in a brothel. Maybe we could use the excuse "well, that's more of a problem in the city with all those hoodlums". Steubenville proved that one wrong. Let's use the typical "insert-victim-blaming-insult-like-she-was-wearing-too-tight-of-clothes-or-she-was-flirting-or-she-was-drinking-too-much". Try telling that to the countless girls who are on a date with a boy who just does not understand the word "NO". Or tell that to the wife who is raped by her husband because he thinks it's his "right" to have sex whenever he demands.
Rape has existed since .... well, forever, I suppose. Every 20 minutes, a woman in India is raped; it is down to less than every 5 minutes in South Africa; even America, that number ranges between every 2 to 6 minutes. It is easy to write it off as "a sad reality of life". Try using that excuse to the girl repeatedly raped every day because she is held in bondage in a brothel. Maybe we could use the excuse "well, that's more of a problem in the city with all those hoodlums". Steubenville proved that one wrong. Let's use the typical "insert-victim-blaming-insult-like-she-was-wearing-too-tight-of-clothes-or-she-was-flirting-or-she-was-drinking-too-much". Try telling that to the countless girls who are on a date with a boy who just does not understand the word "NO". Or tell that to the wife who is raped by her husband because he thinks it's his "right" to have sex whenever he demands.
I admit that for the longest time, rape seemed like such a far-away thing; the problem of another time, another place. I feel awful that, like countless other freshman at BYU, I made jokes about the rape whistles given to us. I feel awful that I spent the majority of my life not even giving a second thought to sexual violence; honestly, I'm not even sure when I realized such a thing existed in the world. But, thankfully (at least I see it as thankfully), I realized that rape effects our reality whether we think it does or not. I would be lying if I said that every once in a while, when I see a man walking down the street towards me at night-- I hold my breath and I feel my heart starting to pick up. I feel my mind saying "please don't let him notice me. please don't let him do anything. please.". Is this because I have had a "close call"? No. It is because rape is part of my reality. And I must tell you, it is a part of yours. Yes, you. The person reading this blog right now. Rape is part of your reality.... whether you want it to be or not.
Rape is not something we can, nor should, push aside any more. It finally feels like the cards are starting to unfold, the stars are aligning, all the ducks are coming in a row, whatever cliche you want to insert. The fact is that NOW is the time for us to STAND UP. This is more than a discussion of gender equality; the negative effects of the media; of pornography; of the marginalization of women. This is a discussion about HUMAN RIGHTS. The most fundamental human right-- the freedom to choose-- is torn away through the act of rape. India, Egypt, and countless other countries are telling the world that they ready to change. And these brave men and women are proving that our VOICES really are the most powerful weapon of all. But it cannot end there-- we must become more comfortable discussing the issues; education is key. We must hold police officers and judges responsible for upholding the law. We must lend our voices in support for those men and women in different cities, different countries who are searching for their own solutions to the stigmas and hurdles in their society. We must win this fight my friends. We must.
